Wood You Be Mine? Act 2, Part 2

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“We’re actually not that far,” Timothy replied, “start by heading north out of town and in to the woods. As luck would have it, it’s roughly three kilometers away. We can get there in no time!”
Needing to hear no more, Legno rapidly made his way through town and in to the heavily forested area, all the while having Timothy perched carefully upon his shoulder. Not one for the great outdoors, this was the first time Legno had traversed the region. It was the first time he heard the crunch of the dry grass beneath his feet, the first time he had been eclipsed by the lush green of the cherry bark oak trees, the first time the growling sounds of the animals filled his ears.
But as exciting as this all was to his senses, more exciting was the prospect of the new beginning that Timothy had promised. Unfortunately, despite his emotional enthusiasm, Legno’s diminutive frame wasn’t used to supporting this much physical exertion, and he was soon doubled over and wheezing.
*Huff* “Are…” *huff* “…you sure…” *huff* “…we’re going…” *huff* “…the right…” *huff* “…way?”
“Yes, yes. But take a minute to catch your breath. You’ll do neither of us any good by passing out in the woods,” Timothy answered.
“It’s just that we’ve been traveling for hours, and I feel like we haven’t gotten any closer,” Legno said, sounding more than a little discouraged.
“It’s been fourteen seconds, Legno,” Timothy responded. “Look,” he said, pointing with his cane, “you can still clearly see everyone in town.”
“That can’t be ri…” Legno began as he glanced over his shoulder, only to see the townspeople going about their day, their voices still audible:
“What do you mean you’re out of eggs!”
“I swear to GOD I’m not afraid to slap you in public!”
“The minstrels were hot, but they were way too old. I wonder if they have a younger brother…”
“And then he said he wanted to see if I ‘lived up to my name,’ the creep.”
“Huh, well, I’ll be dipped. Hey look, there Diana goes again!” Legno then cupped his hands and screamed, “Diana! Hey, Diana!”
“What!” she screamed back. “What is it you want this time, creep!”
“That dress makes your ass look fat!”
His legs now going faster than anyone thought humanly possible, Legno made his way through the woods with the blistering speed of an arrow shot by an expert marksman. His movements were precise, fluid, and flawless.
Now deep in the heart of the Sicilian woodlands, Diana was finally no longer in sight and no longer could the screams of “If you thought that hurt the first time, wait until I use my good leg!” be heard. Legno considered it safe for a momentary stop. And as soon as he did, a fuming Timothy shouted, “Why in Heaven’s name did you think that was a good idea!”
“As great as true love is,” Legno replied, his breathing once again heavy, “I needed a little more incentive to keep moving.”
Now confused, Timothy asked, “And that would be…?”
“Not wanting to get kicked in the testicles twice in the same morning,” he answered back with a smirk. “Now, can we sit for a spell? It feels like my lungs are on fire.”
“Yes, that’s probably for the best. But do remember, we’re on a tight schedule,” Timothy warned.
“Yeah, I know, I know,” Legno replied as he plopped down on the ground. The sound of his breathing had that loud, nasally, wheezing noise that mimicked the tone of an enraged howler monkey. Thankfully, after a few minutes, his breathing returned to normal, and his heart no longer felt as if it was going to burst out of his chest.
Placing his hands on the ground, he pushed himself up, wiped his now-running nose with a dirty finger as a loud *SNURF* sound radiated from his nostrils, rubbed his face, and cleaned the mess on his hands with the backside of his shorts.
Immediately trying to forget what he had just witnessed, a repulsed Timothy asked “Are we…*urp*.” Right away, Timothy balled his left hand in to a fist and covered his mouth.
After taking a second to make sure he stomach was settled, he began again, “Terribly sorry about that. Are we quite ready, then?”
“Yep, yep,” Legno responded, some of his pep returning to him, “let’s get a move on.”
With Legno back on his feet, the pair resumed their journey. The boy was getting more and more acclimated to the outdoors as he maneuvered his lithe, narrow frame over the rocks and through the trees. All the while, Timothy played director, instructing Legno on where to go at every twist and turn.
“We’re getting close!” Timothy exclaimed eagerly, “Just a few more minutes and we should be there. Take a right at this bend, and that will guide you the rest of the way. The old girl’s going to be delighted to meet you, I’m sure.”
“Cool, cool. I love old ladies. They always have the most interesting smells. How do you know this one exactly?”
“Oh, we’re old acquaintances. She’s the one who taught me everything I know and made me what I am.”
Legno’s face lit up as he turned to Timothy, “So the top hat…!”
“Enough with the hat, son. As I was saying, back when I was just another insect, acting entirely on instinct, something drew me to her cabin. It’s hard to say what; life before that day’s not quite clear. But what I do remember is that it was as if I had been living in a house where the curtains were always closed. And after she helped me, it was as if the curtains had finally been drawn and I was able to see the sun for the first time.”
“But why did she change you? I feel like most people would just step on you when your back is turned.”
“A lovely thought, thank you for that,” Timothy drolly responded.
“Just sayin’,” Legno remarked under his breath.
TO BE CONTINUED
Things are certainly heating up now, aren’t they? Looks like Legno’s finally getting a stroke of luck in Timothy, but can the little bugger actually deliver? And how exactly did he become the walking, talking insect we’ve all grown to love? Guess you’re going to have to keep reading to find out! In the meantime, keep yourself busy by commenting and sharing on Facebook and Twitter.